Relentless Redemption: A Military Vet’s Ultramarathon Comeback

From heroin addiction and a jail cell to ultramarathons and a microphone—Shawn Livingston’s life is nothing short of extraordinary. Kicked out of the military for drug abuse and staring down a 20-year prison sentence, a judge gave him one last chance. What he did with that chance is a lesson in redemption, mental toughness, and raw authenticity. His story will shake you, inspire you, and challenge everything you think you know about resilience.

Why would someone coming out of addiction and incarceration run 100 miles? Because for Shawn, running is medicine. It gave him what pills and therapy never could—a way to process pain, rebuild identity, and fight back against every demon that once tried to bury him. Today, he’s not just a combat veteran or a former addict—he’s a speaker, mentor, ultramarathoner, weight lifter and host of the powerful podcast I Am Redemption.

In this episode of the Crackin Backs Podcast, Shawn opens up about:

• The moment in court that changed his life
• How running helped him rewrite his story
• What addiction and war never taught him that the first mile of an ultramarathon did
• How to silence the mental walls that scream "quit"
• The meaning behind his mantra: Be Somebody’s Pacer
• Why he has zero regrets—and how you can find strength in your past, no matter how dark

This is more than a comeback story. It’s a wake-up call for anyone feeling stuck, defeated, or alone. Because everyone has a 100-mile mountain to climb—and Shawn Livingston proves it’s possible to reach the top.

 Watch his full documentary: 100 Miles to Redemption  Listen to his podcast: I Am Redemption Podcast  Learn more about Shawn: www.iamredemption.com

We are two sports chiropractors, seeking knowledge from some of the best resources in the world of health. From our perspective, health is more than just “Crackin Backs” but a deep dive into physical, mental, and nutritional well-being philosophies.

Join us as we talk to some of the greatest minds and discover some of the most incredible gems you can use to maintain a higher level of health. Crackin Backs Podcast

Transcript

Unknown: 0:00

Imagine standing inches away from 20 years behind bars, then getting one final chance and turning that chance into a 100 mile ultra marathon. Our guest today, Shawn Livingston, embodies the word redemption, a combat veteran who clawed his way out of addiction. Sean transformed his rock bottom into relentless strength. He found healing through running and weight lifting, proving to the world that no mountain is too high, no pass too dark if you ever hit a wall, thought about quitting, Sean's message be somebody's pacer will ignite your spirit and redefine what's possible. Hey, welcome to the cracking backs podcast. Get ready for an episode you'll never forget. Welcome to the cracking backs podcast. Shawn Livingston, man, I got a funny feeling this is going to be in a very engaging and maybe somewhat inspiring and shocking program, because you have quite a cool history. Welcome to the show, Sean, thank you, sir. Thank you. Pleasure to be here. Thank you guys for having me on. You're welcome, my friend, Sean, let me go back to an event that happened in your life, and paint a really vivid and aggressive picture that puts you on the edge of a decision, and want to share some of your thoughts. The judge told you clearly, this is your last chance, man, you were inches away from 20 years behind bars. Take us back to that courtroom and what was going through your mind and when you realize you're getting a second chance. Why in the world was your first instinct to start running a freaking 100 mile ultra marathon, Dude, I'm so impressed. What did you learn in that first mile? Was it that first run? That prison? What? More addiction? What? What, what, what taught you?

Shawn Livingston: 2:05

It's a that's a loaded question, though, because, you know, I used to run around in the streets post military, and you know, all the places I've lived, the experience I've had, and run around like I was this big, tough guy. And all I know is, I stood in front of a judge one day, and he looked me directly in the eyes, and he said there was no reason to sentence me to under 20 years. And at that, like, exact moment, all the tough guy shit went out the window for me. Um, you know, I was, I was scared for my life. And so at that point, it was a it was a foregone conclusion I was going away for 20 years, so I didn't really have any there was no avenues of me trying to get out of trouble anymore. That's just what it was. And so I spoke with my lawyer, and I said, you know, until it's time for sentencing, is there any way I could go try to get, get into treatment and get clean so at least when I go, you know, I could try to be on speaking terms with my family, hopefully, or so I don't have to withdraw when I go to jail. And so they granted me the permission to basically go seek treatment during that time. So as long as I was in treatment, they weren't going to sentence me. And so I ended up staying in that that was a six month inpatient facility, and about halfway through that, I had kept this folder and everything of all the work I had done, it's it's shown in the film, but that I ended up going to see my lawyer because it was coming around time we were going to have to go for sentencing. And I handed him the folder. He opened the folder up, and his jaw dropped, and he was like, Sean, you know, I did not expect any of this out of you. You've really given me something to work with here. You've obviously taken steps to change your life. Let me go back and talk to the judge and see what we could do. But whatever you're doing, I just need you to keep doing it. And so that right there just gave me goosebumps, just telling you guys that, because that moment right there, was a moment that I had found hope again, and it had been as long as I can remember, since I had felt that feeling. And so I just felt that hope, and I was just kind of on fire after that. And so I'd went back to the treatment center, and I was just all in whatever I had to do. I was going to be first to every group. I was up the earliest, you name it, I was on fire. And so around that time, I remember taking a look in the mirror, and I just I hated who I saw. Physically, I'd always grown up an athlete, but because of injury and addiction, I'd let myself go. You know, I had a huge gut. Felt like crap, looked like crap. And so found out about a little running group that met in downtown Austin. I went and spoke to the treatment center. They gave me special permission that I could go there and run. They knew it was a good physical activity with good people. So I went there, and my ego is still huge, and I showed up. And I've been an athlete my whole life. None of these men or women got anything for me. And so I show up to this run. There's about 30 men or women there, and my ego is huge. And so we go off on this run, I end up coming in dead last on a two mile run. My lungs are on absolute fire from still smoking a pack in Newport today. So needless to say, it was a very humbling experience, but that that feeling of of sense of accomplishment, again, was something I hadn't felt in so long. And so I was like, I'm. Going to keep I just want to keep doing it. And so I just kept coming back. Pretty soon, two miles turned into three miles. Three miles turned into four miles. I put the cigarettes down, then I ended up falling in the right group of people that saw something in me that I didn't see in myself. And so one woman in particular, I know this is a very long answer to your question, but uh, there was one woman in particular that that saw something in me that I didn't see in myself. And so I had begged her if she could train me up to run a race. And so she started training me up for a 10k and so we're out on the trail, and she's teaching me, you know, how to run trails and all that. And we go and I finally do my 10k and I get done, and I'm all excited and filming myself, and she just kind of looked at me and shrugged. And she was like, that's all right, you could do more. And I was like, What do you mean? She's like, you can run farther. And I was like, All right, then I'll run farther. And so then my next race was a 30k and then she did it again. And then my next race was a 50k and she did it again. And then about just that, at about a year sober, I had done 100k um, 62 miles in Bandera, Texas ended up qualifying for a really big race called Western states, and that right there was a huge moment for me, because that's kind of what broke me out of this mindset of years of being in rooms, introducing myself as an addict and alcoholic, to the point where It basically in my mind, become my identity, that after completing that race, that was a major moment for me, that was like, I'm capable of far more than what I've been giving myself credit for. And so it was just on from there, and then the hunter model would end up coming after that, and would just keep it going.

Unknown: 6:35

Wait, I interject something. People, when you watch this show, you're gonna look at this guy, and he's not gonna look like an ultra marathoner, a marathoner, or even a runner. That's amazing,

Shawn Livingston: 6:48

too, if you watch, if you watch the film, I did not weigh what I back then. I was probably about 195 and I hadn't discovered the gym yet, so I very much had a runner's body.

Unknown: 6:59

Oh, that is outstanding. You once said that running is my medicine. What? What exactly did Ronnie give you that pills and traditional therapy never could

Shawn Livingston: 7:11

everything? Um, I look back of getting out of the military and they diagnosed me PTSD, depression, anxiety disorder, panic disorder, agoraphobia, Sleep Disorder, nightmares, like I can keep going, and their answer was steroid shots in my backs and all these bottles of pills, and they just slid them over to me, and it never felt right with me, because that's what got me in trouble with the in the first place, was the pills. And so I didn't think of it then, but I look back now and it, you know, I get pretty upset, because at no time did any doctor ever ask me, how are you eating, how are you sleeping? Are you exercising? Do you drink water? How are you You know, all these fundamental things to be in a good, healthy human being. And so I on my own, while in treatment, started reading books and getting anything I could get my hands on to try to improve myself. And I started teaching myself about all these things. Then I discover running, and I go, and all of a sudden, all these mental health things that I was suffering from just kind of started dissipating a little bit and getting much more manageable. I'm not saying they went away, but it became much, much more manageable to a degree that medication never did it for me, then you start wanting to talk about me finding something that in my life that lit a fire up under my ass, that makes me excited to get up out of bed every morning. It makes me go to bed early. It makes me wake up early. It makes me want to drink water. It makes me want to eat healthy, all these huge, lasting things that outreach to aspects of life I didn't even think of at the time did way more for me than any pill ever has. And so I just always say it's the the best medicine a doctor never prescribed, just because it's done things for my mind, body and spirit tenfold.

Unknown: 8:54

That is so inspiring. Inspiring man. I love hearing this stuff. So you know people, you're welcome. People get challenged all the time by that self talk, you know, instead of walking or going to the gym, they will end up saying, oh, hell, I'll just sit on the couch and watch TV, you know. And the reverse would be, you know, what you probably may have experienced is, you know, I want to drink. I want to do that drug and that or that self talk, is telling you to do so. But what is it that is that voice of reason that people can adopt and be able to move forward and in a positive direction? What does that self talk sound like?

Shawn Livingston: 9:39

I don't think you get the positive self talk in my just in my experience, until you discover some some sort of passion or purpose. Once I discovered a passion, and once I discovered a purpose, those things became far more important to me than any drink or drug. Um, I discovered I had a passion for running. I had a passion for the community that. Came with I had a passion for competing in these races. That was my compassion. And so I had as an addict. I had nothing there was. I had no passion in life. Like my only passion was, how am I going to, you know, scheme money to get my next high. And so now I finally discovered a passion in my life. And so if there was anything in my life, it became so important to me, where, if you or anything is not helping me become a better runner, I don't have time for you. Every person that I align myself, the team of people I choose to surround myself with, all those people better be helping me work towards my goal. So much of my life I can take a look back and look at the people I surrounded myself around and that's a direct reflection however my life was going. And so now it's just always a point to surround myself around people that are far smarter, far better, far higher, achieving all that because it just my insecurities make me want to go harder. And so as far as the self talk, it's, you know, I know what I was as an addict, and it was nothing to be proud of. And somehow I've been able to cultivate this life that I've become very proud of the things that I was most ashamed of, or now the things I'm most proud of, to stand in front of hundreds of people and talk about, and so, you know, my self talk might be a little bit different from from some other people, but as an addict, I was willing to do a lot of things other people weren't, and sober, I'm still willing to do a lot of other things people aren't. And so if that means I need to get up earlier than you, or I need to spend more time in the gym, run longer than you, or whatever, like that, like it's at the end of the day, it's a competition with myself. But I'm able to identify things in the world that motivate me. You know, I'm in competition with a lot of people. They just don't know it,

Unknown: 11:40

you know what? Just listening to you, another person comes to mind that I'm sure you resonate with, and that's David Goggins. And so David has a has a slogan. He goes, I'm not crazy. I'm just not you, right? And one of my favorite shirts that I wear, in fact, I wore that on the show one time, and Spencer's Spencer's girlfriend commented, because all she saw was the word suck. But I have a shirt that says, embrace the suck, and I know that's why your favorite favorite things, and I that's one of my favorite slogans. So you know, you're doing these 100 mile races in the gym, all that kind of stuff, and these races, I do Spartan Races, and they're designed to break you, and they're designed to put you down, and they designed to make you quit, and they're designed to shatter you, and they have the Death Race, they have all this kind of stuff. What's your when you want to quit you want to break? What's that your dialog kind of on the same question that Spencer has, but what's that your dialog that just when you're at your core, that keeps you going.

Shawn Livingston: 12:44

That's a very, very good question, um, and I'm not, I'm not doing hundreds anymore. Somebody just asked me yesterday when my next 100 is and I'll be and I said, I'll be honest, I don't think I still have that same fire that was burning then. I think I could do it. But I was a madman back then, like I was, I was, I was obsessed, um, just, just highly motivated. But ultra marathons are a very funny thing. You get to a certain point, and there's not a step you don't take where you don't think about quitting, um, you know, the 100 mile race that they did the movie on, you know, in the movie, I think I talked about, you know, I made it to miles 70 of the 100 miles. And if you get the 70 of 100 anything, you're like, Oh man, I'm almost done, but you still have 30 more of the most rugged miles through night time you haven't sat down and ate a full meal. So there's a lot of times every step you're taking in Mile 70 or whatever, you're like, I could just hang it up right now. Like, who's gonna who's gonna turn their nose up to me, because most people won't even run 70 miles cumulatively in their life, but I just did that all at once so I could stop now and be good. But at the time, at the time in the especially the movie, specifically, my grandma had messaged me that morning, and a big part of the film is me rebuilding the relationship with my family. I live in Texas. They live in Ohio. I was about a year sober as this race was going on, but they live up there. They had heard all the lip service before that things were going to be different, and so now, you know, things are actually different, and in this really cool way, running showed them that life was life was changing. But I didn't know if my family knew I was running this race or anything, but I did get a text from my grandma that morning, and obviously I have movie cameras following me around and all that, but her text said it's almost going to get me choked up talking about it. She said, Honey. Just so you know in the evening time when you get lonely or when you get Lonely or Tired, just know that no matter what that I'm following along at home on my iPad, and I kept that with me the entire time. And so every time I wanted to quit, I would have to ask myself, like, if my grandmother was watching me on TV right now, could I really quit in front of him? And that was the one thing where I just I couldn't do it. It did. Matter about the cameras or any of that, it was that thought of knowing that she was, uh, she was at home following along, and so that for that particular race was that, and so that's what I'm saying. I don't know that I still have that fire burning anymore, but, you know, tapping in on things, of being willing to do it, other people aren't, or, you know, whatever the main motivation is for that race. But, you know, David Goggin says, embrace the suck. I like saying the only way out is through. You could sit there and be at mile 30 of 100 mile race, and you could sit there and think all you want about the 70 miles you got to go, but the only way you ever gonna get done with it is just to get it going. So just keep pushing forward, one foot in front of the other, and eventually you will get there.

Unknown: 15:41

Well, well, well, my Well, my partner Composes Himself

Dr. Spencer Baron: 15:45

and made sure I have napkins. I hate you for that.

Shawn Livingston: 15:53

What's crazy is, what's crazy is, is, I've told these stories more times than I can count, but there's no one will always catch me inevitably and still get me back to that moment and choked up.

Unknown: 16:05

That's awesome. Yeah, you know another great man is Coby Bryant, and he was asked one time, knowing what you know now, what would you change? And he let the camera ride. The eye goes, I wouldn't change anything. You know you've never should have. Could your past, you know, at one time you described using hair when, like you were brushing your teeth. So what do you what is it about opening declaring that you would change? Why would why no regrets for you?

Shawn Livingston: 16:36

It's funny you said that about COVID, because I use COVID as a constant example with people, and I always tell a story. I did an interview with Austin marathon, and the most important question I've ever been asked in my life was that same question. And, you know, I thought long and hard about the question. Obviously, I'm sorry for anybody that got hurt along the way, especially my family, but I now know that I had to go through every single thing I went through to be who I am today, and I wouldn't change that for anything. I think I'm uniquely qualified now to work with people that are there's a lot of other people that aren't able to reach. Somehow my story has been able to translate and help inspire people, or anything like that. And so I read a book in prison, purpose driven life. I know a lot of people know it, and it really made me turn inside and start contemplating, you know, deep thoughts of like, What is my purpose on this earth? And for me to sit here and be selfish and think that my purpose on this earth is just to be happy and all sunshine and rainbows all the time, like, that's not how life works. And so in prison, I had come to the terms with, you know, I was able to accomplish quite a bit at a young age. And, you know, be successful at sports, go to the military. I was a big brother that could be looked up to. And as I sat in prison, I knew I wasn't anymore. And so at that time, I had come to the terms of, like, my purpose on this earth was to ascend high and then crash and burn, just so my brothers and sisters can see what not to do, then I'd do it all over again. And so it's very much the similar way, like I wouldn't change anything about my story, because I wouldn't be doing what I am today, and I wouldn't be able to touch or work with any of the people that I do.

Unknown: 18:16

Oh, man, this is one of those interviews. Boy, I'll tell you again, I get inspired, and then I'm like, wrecked, man. So Sean, it's Friday. I'm not trying to get oh yeah, go ahead, Sean. There's always a fascinating moment where you have this sudden realization that the past no longer defines you. You started to bring that up, but I want to bring you back to a moment. A is there a single moment that you realized that your identity, your old identity, you shed your old identity, and you became a new and improved Sean Livingston.

Shawn Livingston: 19:06

I mean, the, I'd say symbolically, probably the 100 mile race. Finishing that 100 mile race was a, you know, that was a big moment. I'll be, I'll be honest, since I got sober, since I got involved in the running community, since I got involved with fitness and healthy and all that. I really have never had that moment where I looked back and like, Oh, am I gonna get high? Um, I've been so excited to have the life that I do now that I've just, you know what I mean? Like, I'm very present in it. Um, I don't know that's Can you What did you ask again? I'm sorry,

Unknown: 19:38

yeah, yeah, if there was that single moment that you realized, man, I'm done with that past and that you know my new identity and my new excitement, like sometimes you know the symbolism of crossing a finish line. Maybe it was during a 5k or a 10k you know, or where you you know past a certain person. And that that, you know, in a race that you went, Man, I am, I am a different a different dude. I'll

Shawn Livingston: 20:08

tell you what it is. I'll tell you what it is. So the first thing, the first thing they filmed for the documentary was the trailer. And documentary films, you know, they don't make a ton of money. They don't get released in theaters. So usually it's just a passionate filmmaker who believes in a in a story, and then, you know, funds the project. So they had filmed the, they'd film the 100 mile race, basically. And so they had a sizzle reel. And so they came back to Austin, and they invited 200 Austin runners out on one evening, and they had it at this, you know, beautiful place, and they unveiled the trailer, and then we got up and we're going to speak. And so a lot of people in the running community knew who I was, just from running ultra marathons and some of these crazy races, but they didn't quite know the whole story. And so we go up, the trailer goes up, the lights go off, and within three minutes, now, 200 people know that I'm a four time felon, kicked out of the military heroin addict, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I remember the lights gone, and the only way I could describe it, it was like my mom pushed me out of the front door and just shut it naked for the first day of school. And I was just standing there, like, that's what it felt like. And I just remember the whole time I was speaking. I don't remember anything I said, because the whole time I'm like, Oh, what are these people going to think of me? They're not going to want to run with me anymore. They're not gonna talk to me. And as soon as I got done speaking, and I put the microphone down and looked up, 200 people converged on me, and everybody in that crowd was this is not a recovery event. People are sitting there telling me about addiction and alcoholism, issues that they have, that their family has, sexual trauma, suicide, mental health, just this overflowing amount of of stories and experiences coming at me and that right there was a major moment for me, because I did not know that a world existed where I could ever take all this pain and all this all this bullshit that I had been through and ever use it to help other people, or to know that it could help other people. Because in my mind, I just got I got sober, I got my shit together and started running, and good things started to happen, but to everybody else, the story means something else. And so that right there was would let me know is, like, wait a minute, like, that's not me anymore. This is me. I've been put in this position to be able to do this, and so from there, it was just kind of navigating the world and figuring out, how do I do it in the most effective way, and how do I help the most people that I can? Because at the end of the day, you know, I've always tried to fill this hole inside of my heart with drugs or alcohol, and the only thing that's ever filled it was, you know what I mean, believing in something bigger than myself and then helping

Unknown: 22:42

other people who Sean you. This appears to be the time that you realize that your own pain could be someone else's lifeline, and when those 200 people started spilling their guts to you because they could relate and resonate with what you've been through, you often refer your, I love your philosophy about be somebody's Pacer, you know, how does that? You know, talk about that, because I love listening to your story. Talk about that. That that concept. So

Shawn Livingston: 23:15

that was, that's funny. You bring that up. I haven't heard that in a while, but there was a, there was a company called wicked trail. They were my first sponsor, and so they came on board and and we were talking about, you know, different ideas and stuff like that. And that was just something that I randomly had said, because to me getting sober, the most selfish thing I could ever have done was just got sober and then went on about and lived my life like my parents were ashamed. They were ashamed of what we had been through, like they would hurt. And so Okay, I got sober. My family's still dealing with all that. They're going with their recovery of their own. Now you want to flip everything on its head and give some of that pain some power, give it purpose. And so once you start using that experience to help other people, you start watching the pride you get. You know what I mean? I'm proud to stand in front of people now and talk about being talk about being a heroin addict. I'm proud to say these things. My family is proud of our story now. And so you give it a whole different meaning when you could be somebody's Pacer. You go help somebody out. You've been there before, you're fresh. You don't need any help right now, but you could be there for somebody else and get them through it, because at the end of the day in recovery, you find out helping other people is what truly helps us. And so just always being there for being there for people be somebody's pace, and when they need picked up, you pick them up.

Unknown: 24:30

Man, that is, that is probably one of the best pieces of information. And I love the idea of you becoming selfless and helping others through what you've learned and experienced. And I think that's fantastic. Um, so your story emphasizes that nobody conquers their mountain alone, and you know who showed up at a critical moment changing that course of your life? Was it that that that particular woman you mentioned in the beginning? You that wanted you to try running, and how did that experience shape the way you show up for others now,

Shawn Livingston: 25:08

so if we got time, I got a really good story for you. All right, so this is the best one I got. We're gonna have to wrap it up after this, because I got nothing. I'm kidding. So my you guys already know running had a very profound impact on my life, my story, and so my MO always, my whole life, was hanging around the funny guys. It doesn't matter if I'm in school, sports, jail, prison, you know, the military. I hang around the funny guys, we talk shit. That's how we pass time. So I'm in the process of getting kicked out of the military. I felt filled my first urinalysis for heroin. They're sending me away to a 30 day treatment center in Austin, Texas. I get shipped out there. My mind is not focused on getting sober. I'm trying to get out of trouble, and so I'm trying to salvage my military career. I get sent there, I immediately go in there meet a guy six, seven years younger than me, funny as hell. And I was like, Oh, perfect. Here's my rehab, homie. We're gonna ride this out. And so we're in there every day. We're talking in groups. I'm talking to girls. We're doing everything you shouldn't be doing while you're in treatment. Then I break one of the cardinal rules, and I start dating one of the girls in the treatment center. Anybody in recovery knows that's like, rule number one, don't do so I start doing that, get out. End up in the most toxic two year relationship known to mankind. Through that time, start getting in trouble with the law. Catch two felonies for heroin possessions. So now it's time. I gotta go to gotta go away. In my delusional mind. I'm like, Oh, I got my girl. She's going to hold me down. She'll write me while I'm gone, my boys, they'll put money on my books. I'll be fine. I go away. How many times you think I heard from my girl while I was gone? Zero, not a once, not $1 on my books from anybody? Nothing like that. So I do my two years. I parole back. I come back to Austin, Texas, I get out, and I make the logical drug addict decision, because I'm lonely and I've been in prison. Then I got to look the girl up to see what she's up to, even though she didn't talk to me the whole time. So I look her up now, come to find out, she's with my young buddy from the treatment center. They're together now. So I start texting her. She starts texting me back. She starts sneaking around behind his back to come see me. He finds out about me, so he's texting me, and he's calling me, and we're going back and forth, we're gonna meet, we're gonna fight, we're gonna do all these things. And so about a week of that went on, and I'd had enough all that, so I found out where he lived. He lived in these very nice gated community apartments. So I went and I found him. I hopped the fence. I go to his door. I'm knocking on the door. I'm trying to get him to come outside. Now, the girl inside was, she was very excited. There were two guys getting ready to fight over her, and she had a Are you familiar with borderline, borderline personality? Oh, yeah. So it's like, you go from like zero to 1000 and then back to zero for no reason. So yeah, needless to say, it was never a dull moment. Um, so he won't come outside. She ends up packing her stuff. She leaves and comes with me. And now I feel like I just won the grand prize. So I have this delusional plan that we're going to move to Temple Texas, and because there's a large VA there, that I'll be able to get sober there. So we drive to Temple, Texas. We pull into town. I get the first little crackhead motel I could find, cheap, cheap room. We go in there, she starts unpacking all of her stuff. All of a sudden, out comes a laptop. All comes an iPad, out comes a cell phone, outcomes, a PlayStation, all this electronic stuff I know she didn't have the money for. Now, one thing I never got down with an addiction was stealing. Um, it always just felt like bad karma. I never stole anything, so I never had any problem with him, other than the girl. And now I got the gut. Now I got the girl back. So in my mind, we're good. And so I end up calling him up. I let him know I got your stuff. I'm not going to do anything with it. You're more than welcome to come get it. He thought I was trying to, like, set him up or something. So he ended up sending his mother to come pick up this stuff. Now, why you would send your mom to a shady motel or some dude, he thinks trying to set you up? I don't know, but that's what he did. Was a very nice woman. I gave her the stuff back. That's that right now. Fast Forward, three years later, I end up in Austin, Texas. I'm in treatment. I start discovering running, meet, meet my friend Penny. She starts telling me about trail races, so she's training me up for my first trail. So we're out there running one day on the trail, and I'm sitting there, and I'm telling her my whole story. I'm very open with it. I tell it all the time. So I'm telling her I fell piss test, got kicked out of the military, ended up going to treatment, ended up with this girl. And then I said the girl's name, and the girl has a very unique name. It's not one you hear every day, and so we're running along. And as soon as I said her name, my friend Penny stops and just looks over at me, and she's like, Sean, do you know my son? And I was like, well, who's your son? It. Her son was my young buddy from the treatment center. She was the mother. She was the mother that three years before, came and picked this stuff up off me. We had no idea, no now, just to give you some just to give you some perspective, Austin is growing every day. In that time, we have had an influx of Elon Musk, Joe Rogan, all these California people have flooded here. What are the chances that I leave a city growing every day for three years and I come back and get plugged in with the one person that would introduce me to an avenue that would literally save my life? That story could have went down so many astronomical ways. We could have fought somebody could have got hurt, somebody could have got robbed. I could have hurt her like anything could have happened. Returning that stuff was the one honest thing I did my entire addiction. I still to this day, don't know why I did it. I don't know why I went out of my way. Um, you know, I don't I don't know what your guys beliefs are, and I don't want to impress upon anybody, but like in addiction, I wasn't a big God guy that right there smacked me in the face and let me know God is very, very real in my life. Um, and so that right there is why Penny is such a big part of my life. She's one of my best friends to this day. She was the vice president for cyber security for visa, right? On what spectrum of the universe does a four time felon kicked out of the military, heroin addict become best friends with the Vice President of cyber security for visa? Like it's just there's too many things that could be for it to be coincidence. So

Unknown: 31:35

that was fantastic. Wow. Hey, and don't, don't hold us Californians, you know, down too much. You know,

Shawn Livingston: 31:44

I was just, I was just out in LA during the fires. I absolutely, obviously the fire is horrible, but I loved it out there. It was awesome.

Unknown: 31:52

Well, the fires are about 30 minutes from my house. So if you ever come out this way again, you have a place. I'll

Shawn Livingston: 31:58

be out there. I'll be out there in June. Love it. Love it. We'll hook up.

Unknown: 32:02

So I got a question, so I got another, another crazy shot. So I was a for when, when you were running marathons. I was doing high altitude mountain mountains, and I remember stay at the base. I did them all without oxygen, and I remember saying, the base of a 22,000 foot mountain, and we could see the summit. And I remember talking to my buddy, and I'm like, How the hell am I going to get up that mountain? And his advice is, me is one step at a time. And and I remember that was my mantra when I met 19,000 the dust zone, hiking with and trying to make it up that just one step at a time. So you did 100 mile run, you're now in the weight room, and you put on massive amounts of weights. What is for those that are listening that have that their mountain to climb, that they are just stuck and they don't know how to do it, what is your advice to have them move forward? Mine was one step at a time. What's your advice to get them out of the stuck

Shawn Livingston: 33:03

don't do it alone. Don't do it alone. We just oftentimes, especially when I get all emotional inside of a situation, I think I know what's right. I think I know it needs to happen, but I'm just too emotional or too close to the situation to know. So I would say probably reach out. You know what I mean, reach out to people that you know and trust. Have those I'm very serious about the keep people I keep around me to two Thanksgivings ago, my best friend in the world, he and I are no longer friends, just because he wasn't operating in a way like I hold people to a standard that just like I hold myself to a standard. So that stuff's kind of non negotiable for me. So that, I think, is also big of the people you choose to be around you. But much like you're one foot in front of the other in my 100 mile race, it was aid station, aid station. If you sit there and you try to think about that whole 100 miles, it's gonna it's gonna mind fuck you, the whole time. But I can break it down and segment it, aid station, aid station. So I know from this aid station to the next one is 6.2 miles, the next one's 3.7 and so if I break it down like that, it's much more, much easier for me to, like, comprehend and look, as opposed to looking at this whole one big problem. So if somebody's going through something, if they're able to break it down and segment it like that and just be like, alright, you know, whatever it is, I need to pay this huge bill right here. It's like, I can chip away 200 bucks. Boom, I can do that. And so it's just aid station, aid station till, till we get the job done.

Unknown: 34:32

You know, you're, you're wearing it and that, and that's, you know, I think that's what it is. I think people like a too big of a chunk, and they never break it down. You're also wearing a shirt, and I, and I purposely did not watch your documentary because I didn't want to be influenced at all when I when I met you and talked to you, I wanted to hear a raw story and just get to know who you were from a personal standpoint, and I wanted to give you the respect of not being preconceived with anything. And. And when I look at your shirt, I am redemption. Love that. Can you I want to hear more about that, where that come from, and what that means.

Shawn Livingston: 35:10

So that's the, that's the podcast that I do. Um, I'm redemption. But it's, it's turning into something more. It's, it's basically become a community, organically, somehow, um, and it's just continuing to grow. So my goal, I remember when I sat down with the people that I do the podcast with originally, and they were going over logos and names and ideas and all that, and the name they had come up with was rise above that was their name they wanted to use. And when they told it to me, it sounded cool. And, you know, they had a little mountain with a little bird going over it with the sun. And I was like, I like it. It's, you know, it's inspirational and everything it sounds like every, every treatment center I ever went to, though, like it's just that kind of generic name of, like, new hope or rise above. Like, there's nothing to that that, like, grabs you when they named the documentary 100 miles to redemption. That word redemption is always just like, it smacks when I hear it. That's what it does for me. And so I was just like, how about I am redemption? And when I said it, I never meant it as I am. Because the one thing I've learned in the speaking stuff, and just like the story that I told you, is at the end of the day, we are all recovering from something. For me, it just happened to be drugs and alcohol. But we all have been through, you know, tremendous amounts of life adversity, and so the biggest learning lesson in my life was understanding that everybody has the ability, if they've been lucky enough to make it through adversity or make it to the other side of whatever problem they're having, they're now uniquely qualified to go back and use that to help other people. So it's not I am redemption. It could be anybody that you are redemption if you've been able to do it so and it's just continued to grow into its to its own thing. So we're just gonna see where it goes. I love it,

Unknown: 36:52

you know, I tell you, you mentioned something about, you know, helping you or someone remain consistent and constant in their quest for a positive, more, you know, fulfilling life. You know, you it always helps to have a good partner. And you know, I realized that many, many years ago, even in the gym, you know, training partners come and go, but it was a, it was a such a beautiful metaphor for life that when you found somebody that is consistent, that you wake up in the morning when you don't want to go and do that thing, you go shit. I gotta meet my partner, or my training partner, or whatever it is I gotta. I got, because you almost value their their being more than your own. And I think that is a important message to deliver. So thanks for sharing.

Shawn Livingston: 37:46

That's like, it's like you're being their Pacer, right? Yeah,

Unknown: 37:50

I want to start using that to be your that's it be a pacer. I love that. So, Sean, you man, I'm like sweating from your story. They are very riveting. And that the, yeah, the the, the way things happen in life, man, there is, there is something that that really puts and pulls people together when they really want to. And I thank you for sharing that where those you enter one of my favorite parts of our program, and it's the rapid fire questions. You know, at this point you seem to have a great story for each one, even though we like it rapid fire, but, man, if we get hung up on a cool comment or storyline, go for it. Are you ready one of one of five questions? You ready for number one? Let's get it all right, my man, would you rather relieve your fir? Excuse me, would you rather relive your first ultra marathon without shoes or go one on one against your basketball idol with the whole running community watching? Oh,

Shawn Livingston: 39:01

I'll go, I'll go, I'll go, one on one with my idol probably, yeah, they're gonna be way better. They're gonna be way better than me, than basketball, anyway, so I'm not expecting much.

Unknown: 39:14

And who would that idol be? Yeah, um, you know, Jason Williams is white white song. Yes, I do, yes, yes.

Shawn Livingston: 39:27

He was, he was number 55 for the kings. Everybody knew him because he did behind the back, elbow, elbow pass, but he was my guy growing up.

Unknown: 39:36

Nice. Love that. Love that question number two. All right, Sean, here we go. If you had to choose one workout song to represent your life story, which track makes your gym rat playlist? Um, Bart, Bart Crow, top of rock bottom.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 40:01

I gotta listen to that one. Check it out. Is that rock?

Shawn Livingston: 40:05

Yeah, but Bart's a good buddy of mine. He's, he's a big artist here in Austin, and it just so happened that one of my buddies stumbled upon that song of his recently, and he nudged me, and he was like, Hey, man, this should absolutely be the intro to your show. So it's an it's an it's a no brainer, because it goes perfectly along with everything that that I represent and we talk about. So

Unknown: 40:29

that's crazy, great. You often talk about your personal Super Bowl. What's the next big goal that scares you just enough to keep pushing you forward?

Shawn Livingston: 40:42

Building. Apparently, I'm building a business. And I hadn't known it. So I'm I'm not in the business world at all. And so I've found myself now in in a lot of meetings with a lot of people with ties and corporate stuff that I'm not. And so I was talking to a I was talking to a buddy of mine. He's very inspirational speaker and all that, and that was because he's navigating similar waters. And I was like, yeah, man, it's like, I can go in the gym and be around the biggest dudes in the world, and I don't blink, but for some reason I go, and there's a dude who's four foot eight and he has a tie on, and instantly I'm nervous around him, and he kind of chewed in my ass a little bit, and he like, looked at me. He's poking his finger on my chest, and he's like, he's like, bro, when you walk into the room, you are that mother excuse my language, but he's like, You are that motherfucker. And like, you better act like you're that motherfucker. Like, that dude hasn't been through what you've been through. He didn't run 100 miles, he wasn't in the military. And I was just like, oh, wait, yeah, you're right. Like, because I, you know, it's hard to see self, you know I don't, you're a gym, you're a gym guy. So I'm sure you get it like, I compare myself in the gym to people that are this top 1% that I'll, you know, never achieve. But rarely do I ever take a look around Gold's Gym and be like, You know what? Like I'm doing pretty good, I guess, in retrospect, but it's just always, you know, comparing yourself to what you can't achieve, I guess

Unknown: 42:03

that's great, man. I it's funny because we, you know, depending on what we've been exposed to, you know, it's you desensitize after a while. And I always tell my son, who also is a gym, I go watch, watch this guy walk by, and he suddenly does a last sprint because he feels threatened by the fact that we're bigger than him. You know, it's funny that have you have to get desensitized after a while. Have you, have you seen the show? Reacher, yes, yeah. So have you seen the last season? No,

Shawn Livingston: 42:34

this current one? No. But he got even bigger, though.

Unknown: 42:37

So yeah, so he's big, and I'm not gonna blow, I'm not gonna blow the show. But in this show, he has to fight another character, and the character is the tallest bodybuilder in the world, like, big dude, that's seven foot two. And then you're talking about, yeah, yeah, I can't pronounce his name is, like, a you know, but, you know, he's seven foot two. He's the largest bodybuilder in the world, and they have a fight scene. And what you're just tired of talking about, there's an interview with them. And he says, when the guy was asked to just kind of do a fake hit, just kind of swaki is so strong that when he hit the characters reacher, as big as reacher was, he sent him 15 feet, and he goes, it hurts so bad. And he goes, that fight scene, when you watch it, they broken bones, cuts, they destroy each other, and they were holding and he was holding back. He goes, I was so impressed with his size. He goes. And he was the nicest guy in the world, because you think you're big, and then you run into a guy that's like that. It was a really cool interview. I think you would really like it, because he just, he was a kind of humble beep down a little bit. But it was just this great conflict of natural motto, he motto. And it was a really cool interview, right up. Check it out. Yeah, Sean, question number four, if you could spend one minute face to face with your younger self, Sean the dope, what's the single most powerful thing you'd say to that guy? Trust the process. All right. Now, I like it. All right. Question number five, last one, what would you like to be remembered for helping others. Nice, nice. Sean, this interview, this podcast, is one of my, my, my more inspirational ones. You tell a great story. I love your authenticity, man, it's just tell it like it is. It's, that's what makes it inspiring. No bullshit, and I and that last story, God Almighty, very, very good. Thank you so much for being a part of our show today. Of

Shawn Livingston: 44:48

course, I got, if we have a minute, I got another quick story. If we don't, it's

Dr. Spencer Baron: 44:52

fine. No, no, let's hear it. Let's hear it, please. Well, you just

Shawn Livingston: 44:55

said something. You brought me in. You brought me I thought I was out, but you brought another one up. But I. You said about you said about authenticity and and people used people. People tell me that a lot. And at first, when I started hearing it, I didn't quite know what they meant. And so one of the very first professional speaking gigs I ever got booked for was at a university here in here in Austin, called St Edwards. And it was a conference. They had four speakers. I was going to go up third, I remember the fourth guy had wrote a best seller, something about being a millionaire and all that. And so I showed up to this, and I immediately understood that all these people had, like, these were professional speakers suits, you know what I mean? Like they were dressed very, very polished speakers. And so instantly I'm insecure, because, you know, like, it's like being around business people all of a sudden. And so I remember the first guy goes up to speak, and he had, like, the, he was a military guy, and he kind of had, like the, the cadence of, like, a fiery, Brimstone preacher type thing. And so he's up there speaking, and, you know, great speaker, but he's going hard. And so we were supposed to do a 45 minutes talk and then a 45 minute workshop. Well, he did his 45 minute talk, and then he gets done, and he was going to take questions. He didn't prepare a workshop. Not one hand raised. And so I tried to throw him a bone, because he was a vet, and I raised my hand. I was like, What did you do in the military? Sir? And he blurted out, and he goes, kill people. Now, any respectable, any respectable military guy is not going to answer like that. And so I was like, I so nobody really messed with him. The next woman goes up, and she was, like, a Grammy Award winning artist. She had worked with all these really big names. She was very, very good speaker. She did her workshop. She had a couple questions. It was good. And so then I go up and I do my talk, and people are laughing, people are crying. And I was getting ready to roll right into my workshop, and I was like, if anybody has any questions, feel free to raise your hand. I turned around, and when I turned back, every hand in the place was raised. And I was just like and so I ended up taking questions for the whole 45 minutes. And I can remember towards the end, the woman was in the back going like this, telling me there was no more time left. And I could also see the the keynote speaker walking in, and he's dressed to the nines, good looking dude, like you could tell he was the keynote speaker, and he had his assistant, and they were willing this thing of books in, and he showed up, very Hollywood style, you know, two minutes before he goes on. And so he goes up on stage. And, I mean, he does great, great speaker, does his thing, has some questions. And so he goes to release everybody, so they can go out and, you know, sign autographs, or his books, or whatever. And he goes, All right, you know, single file, everybody, you know, not at once. You know, go ahead and I'll go ahead and release you. And so as soon as he went, released everybody. Everybody again, turned up, turned around and converged on me in the back of the room. And I remember him standing up on stage looking out like, what is going on? Who is this guy? And that was the biggest thing that I heard that day. And finally, I went to a gentleman that was with me, and I was like, Why does everybody keep saying I'm so authentic? And he goes for the exact reason that you were insecure about being here today, that you weren't a trained speaker, is the exact reason everybody loved everything you said, because you were the only one that was up there today that anybody could relate with anything that what you were saying. And so I was just like, wow. And so that was, uh, that's all I needed to hear to ever know. I didn't have to go to school to be a speaker. So I was like, I'm in

Dr. Spencer Baron: 48:29

what a another great story. Man, I love Yeah,

Unknown: 48:34

fantastic. Man, authenticity is everything. Yeah, awesome. Sean, thank you for sharing that really. Man, I have a funny feeling. You have more stories, but then we'll cover on another time, but you let me know I'll be I'll be happy to come back on and tell them to we will have you back on and that we're gonna have you back on after you, I hook you up with this carry the load thing, because I want to hear your I want your thoughts on that.

Shawn Livingston: 48:59

If you guys, if you guys want to do an in person, in person in June, let me know.

Unknown: 49:04

I I just might fly out just to hang out with you, man,

Shawn Livingston: 49:09

all right. Brother, all right. Guys, thank you guys, thank you so much. If I can never do anything to help out, just let

Unknown: 49:15

me know. Love you, man. I appreciate you and Dan, thank you for all your time. All right. Brother, thank you guys. Thank you for listening to today's episode of The cracking backs podcast. We hope you enjoyed it. Make sure you follow us on Instagram at cracking backs podcast. Catch new episodes every Monday. See you next time you.